Seriously Funny Stuff

I was reading on my Www.Facebook.com homepage and I saw a link to this really funny website called Www.DontEvenReply.Com .

If you are interested in a few good laughs, check this out. I was cracking up.

By the way, I missed writing an Independence Day article because I was soaking in the sun on a beach somewhere up north, so Happy Belated Fourth of July!!!

News of the Day

I am just going to say this one time because if I don't I will feel like a jerk, Michael Jackson rest in peace.

I said it. Now I can go on with my day listening to all of the radio stations playing all of the songs we used to listen to before he became a creepy old man.

Adios Amigos!!!

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

Didn't you ever hear your mother say that?

I had a discussion with my oldest daughter recently about her going through the awkward stages growing up. You know, how your nose is too big for your head or your butt is too big for your body?

I told her, "Angel, the things you think are ugly now will be your greatest features later in life. You will learn to appreciate your body for it's uniqueness."

When I was younger, I had a large nose and huge butt. Thankfully, my nose doesn't stand out quite as much and well, the butt is an asset. Hardy har har.

Recently, I came across a group that I really love, called The Suicide Girls, who do not want to look how Hollywood has depicted as beautiful, they just want to be themselves. I love you Suicide Girls. You are what we all should strive to be- proud of our own unique beauty.

Feelings

It's a funny thing your feelings.

Some days your feelings run you and other days logic takes the lead.

I have become a person that is trying to be one hundred percent honest with the people around me. I am not a liar but I have had problems expressing how I feel to people and sometimes it is to my own detriment.

There have also been times when because I did not say how I feel other people have taken my actions to mean something entirely the opposite of what I felt.

As of this day forward, I am not going to hold back. I will say what needs to be said when it needs to be said, how it needs to be said.

There is a VirtuaGuy!!!

Maybe some of you are wondering how I found out about this in the first place.

Let me explain. It was my little brother.

There it is. The cat is out of the bag.

Anyway, I did a genius move and typed into the toolbar Www.VirtuaGuy.com and viola!!! Magic dancing man all over my desktop!!!

So here you are ladies, it's raining men!!!

By the way, KT, doesn't this one look like that georgeous soccer hunk we have been dreaming about???

Strippers in the Dust

Many of you might be a bit intrigued by that title.

No more paying outrageous amounts of money to have a girl dance for you. In the past few years a new, more technological woman has been found: VirtuaGirlHD.

This is a software that features half naked to naked women dancing all around your desktop and other software as you are flitting around your computer screen. This morning, to test drive the product, I played my Windows Media Player along with a dancing girl. It was actually pretty funny.
She hit almost every beat. Of course, I listen to some pretty fast-paced music.

I don't have the naked ones though. It costs for that and frankly, I am not paying anyone for jollies.

For those guys (and girls) stuck at the computer at all hours of the night and day, this may be an interesting way to lighten the mood. I am in the midst of looking for the male strippers as having half-naked women prancing on my desk top is bound to raise some questions eventually.

If you are interested in this product, check out http://www75.virtuagirlhd.com/us/index2.php or Www.VirtuaGirl.com . This link leads right to it as well.

How Not to Date a Married Man

Okay, so maybe you are wondering why I am posting this. Well, it recently became a major factor for me to investigate whether or not a guy who was interested in me was really a married cheater.

He was definitely acting strange.

I only had a cell phone number. He only usually would text me in the evening, very late and then would cut me off short in the middle of conversations. Very strange, indeed.

I am not dumb. I have dated a few other married men, unbeknownst to me at the time. I know what the signs are...now. It was becoming obvious. Then, I just found an article about the signs of a married man and he fit them to a T!!! Aaaahhhh MEN!!! So for all of you single ladies out there trying to avoid the cheater, here is what I found:

1. You've never been to his house. How could you? You would run into the wife and kids.
2. You only have a cell phone number, so as not to disturb the wife and kids.
3. He does his own dishes and such. Trained.
4. He always wants to have sex. Yeah. Sounds kind of normal, except that it's CONSTANT. You go Bob.
5. Tighty whiteys. Nothing sexy because the wife will know something is up.
6. He pays for everything in cash so as to keep things on the dl. Nice. No paper trail.

Oh, yeah, I don't really know about the tighty whiteys because it never got that far. He did however start acting like a jerk when I told him I want to get to know him a while longer before I had sex with him. Yeah. NEXT!!!

There are also ways of checking public records and when I researched this particular man, he didn't have a criminal record but a woman's name kept appearing with him. Yes, I do criminal background checks and to see if a man is married because for some reason, I attract every jerk within a hundred miles. All you have to do is go to your local county website and look under clerical records, then criminal or family or probate. It varies from county to county. Check the sex offender lists as well. You just never know.

Good luck ladies!!! It's slim pickings.